Life . . . Divorce

by Elysian Magazine

8 Tips to Deal With Divorce

Sometimes it is necessary, of course, but divorce is rarely easy. It can be one of the most emotionally challenging experiences anyone can go through, a difficult and trying time for everyone. If you’re currently involved in a divorce, or are about to embark on the process, here are nine tips to help you get through it.

1. Seek Professional Help

Divorce can be an extremely overwhelming and emotional experience, so it’s important to have someone to talk to who can help you navigate through it. Whether you see a therapist, counselor, or coach, professional help can make a world of difference.

2. Give Yourself Time to Grieve

Divorce, the end of a relationship, can be a lot like grieving the loss of a loved one. It’s important to allow yourself time to process your feelings and come to terms with these changes. Don’t be afraid to cry or express your anger and sadness, all a part of the healing process. Divorce can be stressful and emotionally draining; it is a dramatic life change, requiring time to adjust, so be patient and allow yourself the time to heal. Eventually, you will find peace and be able to move forward.

3. Take Care of Yourself

Chances are, you know what builds you up in times of stress, and what wears on you, so focus on things that are uplifting. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Make sure to eat healthy foods, exercise, get enough sleep, and find time for activities that nourish and fulfill you, as it is essential to do things that make you feel good and that strengthen you.

4. Keep the Lines of Communication Open

If you have children, it’s important to keep the lines of communication open with your ex. Responsible coparenting is vitally important for the sake of your children, unless someone’s safety is compromised. Clear and focused conversations about important topics will make it easier for you to co-parent and manage your children’s present and future well being. Even if you don’t have children, communicating clearly with your ex can help make the divorce process less contentious.

Most therapists suggest trying to avoid negotiating aspects of your divorce in front of your children, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. Keeping conversations calm and respectful, especially when children of any age are around, is generally sound advice.

5. Maintain As Much Of a Routine As Possible.

One of the best things you can do for yourself during this time is to maintain your healthy routines. This will help you feel more secure and grounded when everything may feel like it’s up in the air. When your usual routines aren’t possible any longer, when the separation or divorce has necessitated changes, shift gradually so you can mindfully build new healthy habits as you move forward.

6. Keep Busy

Another useful tip is to keep yourself busy. This can help take your mind off your divorce and the stress that comes with it. Finding things to do that you enjoy – hobbies or activities that you’ve loved before or are just finding – can create enough of a break that you’re able to start afresh more easily. Schedule some downtime so that you don’t get too overwhelmed.

7. Seek Out Resources

Take advantage of resources available to help you through your divorce: books, websites, articles, and even people! Seek out information and connections that help you understand the process and help better adjust to the changes in your life. So many people have first-hand experience with divorce and understand at least some of what you’re going through, so don’t hesitate to reach out.

8. Be Positive

Most importantly, try to remain positive. This doesn’t mean that you have to be happy all the time, but it does mean that you should try to focus on the good things in your life, and what might be better as a result. Think about the things that make you happy, and hold onto those things.

By following these tips, you survive through your divorce in your best way possible. Remembering that while this is going to be a difficult time, it is only temporary will help you to move on to the next chapter of your life. Take things one day at a time, be kind to yourself, and know that you will get through this.

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